Some “What Ifs” Are Better than “Oh Wells”

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Via Flickr

I’m sure you’ve heard people saying that it’s better to have done something and regretted it later than to not have done something and always wonder what would have happened if you would have had enough courage to do it. I agree with this, but I also believe that it’s not always true.

There are some things that are better left floating in the land of “what if” than being brought down into the world of reality. Why? Because some things might never turn into “oh well”. They might just turn into “why did I do that?”

Now, it’s hard to figure out which “what ifs” are better than others. Perhaps that’s why the idea of always doing something you want instead of wondering about it came to be. But what if there would be a better way than this? What if we could make sure that we go for the right “what if”, leaving the wrong one behind?

The world in which this always happens is a fictional world. We can’t always know. Sometimes we are going to mess up. Occasionally, we’re going to mess up a lot worse than other times. That’s something we need to learn to accept, because striving for perfection is a losing battle.

When trying to figure out if something is worth the risk, whatever that risk may be,  you have to consider how important that thing is for you. Can you learn to be without it? Be careful here. I wrote “learn” intentionally. It is normal to feel like you can’t be without something you’ve started to “crave”, but as time passes, the craving might go away, and you will learn to be without that thing.

However, if you feel like that thing has the potential to complete your life in a meaningful way, perhaps letting go is not the best thing in the world.

Keep in mind here that whatever the conclusion you arrive at, you might still have to learn to be without that thing, eventually. You can’t always get what you want, so be prepared for that possibility too.

Think of the situation where you might feel tempted to call your ex and try to get back together. Such a decision is always loaded emotionally, and I would personally call up a friend to get their opinion, because it will be less biased than yours, but you can also try to think of whether it’s really worth it. It’s very hard, but even in these situations, where the irrational part of your brain seems to be taking over, you might still be able to hear the voice of rationality, lost between your thoughts. Listen to it.

Even here, you might end up where you started all over again, if your ex won’t want to get back together. If you choose to give it a shot, be prepared for this option. But maybe leaving things at “what if” is the better choice.

/Larisa

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The Terrifying Face of Change

Via Wikimedia

“We are creatures of habit.” The number of times I’ve heard this is ridiculously high, yet I never really gave it much thought. “Yes, I suppose we are.”, I’d say to myself, and go about my day, without really absorbing what the person meant by saying this. Hell, maybe they didn’t even know the extent to which they were right.

The idea of change is a beautiful one, isn’t it? There’s a certain comfort in thinking that your life won’t always be the same. Of course, we hope that someday it will be better. That we’ll get that dream job we’ve wanted since we were kids, that we’ll be able to afford the house, the car, the clothes, and the vacations we want. The reality, however, is that change isn’t always good. Sometimes, we go down a level instead of up. That can happen at work, but it can also happen in life. One day you’re happily riding the “Business Class” of life, and then the next, all of a sudden, you’re sent to “Economy”. No warning, no nothing.

This is why people don’t always welcome change; because they don’t know if it means that something good will happen, or something bad. Of course, some are better than others at dealing with the uncertainty of it all. Yet still, most of us are wired to prefer what is known, because simply knowing something makes it more comforting than not knowing. This is why people will stay in crappy conditions (and I’m sure you can think of someone who has stayed waaaay too long in a bad relationship). Chances are, they probably know that those conditions suck. But there’s a little voice inside of them whispering that maybe, just maybe, if they dare to change something, they might end up in a situation that’s even worse.

Via pixabay
Via pixabay

Many times, change can be seen as a good thing; a way for getting out of a life that’s not offering what you’re looking for. Even so, the more that change is approaching, the more terrifying it can be to look at it.

But there’s good news! Sometimes, change can make it seem as though you’ve gone to a worse place than you were before. Perhaps, temporarily, it may be true. However, if you know how to make use of it, even the scariest of changes can lead to better outcomes. Maybe you find yourself having to quit your job, leading to a period of unemployment. Let’s be honest here: for most people, going from job to no job is going from good to bad. Yet, this may give  you the chance to look for a better job than the one you had. It may push you to do something you never did before, because you were too comfortable.

Change happens outside of your comfort zone, but stepping into that land doesn’t feel all that great at first. There’s a reason it’s called the “comfort” zone. Nevertheless, once the change has occurred, you may just find that your zone of comfort is extended, and you can do so much more than before. This is why, no matter how terrifying change may seem, it certainly comes with benefits.

/Larisa

Memory Month Day 17: Just Flowers and Sun

Via wikipedia

Today was quite an uneventful day, both in terms of this challenge, and in general terms. However, I did get to relax, which was quite nice.

The sun was shining, and so I had the perfect opportunity to spend some time feeling its warmth on my skin, which I haven’t done in a very long while. Also, today was the first day when I heard birds singing, and because of that, I decided to take out my earphones, and enjoy their songs, rather than the ones on my Ipod, which I can listen to during the winter months, unlike the birds’ ones.

Being in nature has this power of energizing me like nothing else out there. It’s like the green grass and the blue of of the sky are the ultimate coffee, capable of giving me strength, and of calming me down, the latter of which coffee isn’t the best at.

I love this time of year for several reasons, one of which is flowers. They are starting to show up everywhere, and seeing them enriching the sight truly makes me happy.

Today was a good day!

/Larisa

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Memory Month Day 13: The Lucky Friday 13

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Via Pixabay

This Friday was one of those days …one of those amazing days. First of all, I got to write my two midterms that I’ve been talking about for what feels like an eternity. The writing itself wasn’t what felt amazing, but the fact that it’s over with.

Actually, even the act of writing those exams gave me an interesting feeling. I spoke about this in my last year’s Memory Month, but it’s such an amazing feeling that I think it deserves one, or possibly more, posts per year.

It’s amazing how the body handles stress, you know? I was stressed this entire week, but when I was writing the midterms, I could concentrate that stress into what I was doing. Plus, even though I was quite tired before having to sit the exams, during them, I felt as awake as ever…actually, even after them, because it takes a while for the body and mind to come back to that neutral state.

Stress can be great like this, but only in low doses. The second it becomes chronic, it also becomes a problem. This is yet another reason why you should take the advice I gave you in yesterday’s post. Even when you’re under a lot of pressure find time to relax somehow. Not only will it give you a better focus afterwards, but it will also keep you sane. Also, chronic stress can impair memory, and that’s not what any of us want. I certainly want an improved memory, not an impaired one. And this is not just because of this challenge. I’d like my memory working at all times, thank you very much.

/Larisa

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It’s in the Small Moments

Via deviantart

I talk about this a lot, but since we live in the society we do, I think it’s a topic that needs to be discussed more, until it becomes routine for us to think about it, as opposed to going out of our way to get it on our mind.

It’s about appreciation. And I don’t mean appreciation of the big things. That comes naturally, usually (and if it doesn’t, it might be due to some condition, such as depression). It makes sense to be happy when you get a promotion, when you graduate, or when you’re finally able to buy the car you’ve always wanted.

I am not talking about that kind of gratitude, but I am not saying we shouldn’t feel it. We should, of course!

The problem is this: big moments are few and far in between. No necessarily, but speaking from a general point of view, they are. But they’re obviously not the only kinds of moments we experience. We go through small ones, too, and I think those need a bit more loving thrown their way, especially since we experience so many small moments.

If we could learn to be thankful for those little things, we could bring more happiness into out lives, which is great news, isn’t it? Well, it’s all fun and games to talk about it, but once you try to implement it…that’s when the problems start arising.

We’re used to be in our own little worlds a bit too much nowadays, and this means that we no longer notice most of what goes on around us. But we should…Oh, we should.

A few days ago, for instance, I was walking to class, and I was in a hurry. Luckily, this didn’t stop me from seeing that there were flowers growing in a little spot, and that made me very happy (I do like both flowers and spring very much, hence the happiness).

This is just an example, and there are many more like it, that if you learn to look around you, you might just smile for longer, and feel better. It’s hard to do, no doubt, especially with all the available technology that we can use to distract yourselves. But it’s doable!

/Larisa

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When Your Laptop Refuses to Cooperate

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Via Pixabay

This past week has been filled with laptop issues. Well, I guess I should say “issue”, because it was the same one coming back over and over, but because it kept returning, I feel that putting it into plural is more appropriate. Plus, “issues” just sounds more dramatic than “issue”.

What happened was that my hard drive stopped working. Actually, it didn’t just completely stop working. Rather, it selectively worked, meaning that it chose when to work, and when not to. Of course, I am fully aware of the fact that the poor hard drive, having no consciousness whatsoever, could not choose what to do, but when you’re the one in front of the thing, trying to get it to work, you start demonizing it for not making the slightest effort to help out.

Initially, I hoped I was going to be able to use it for a few more weeks, and then take it to repair, but it became apparent to me that the situation was getting worse by the day, and so I finally gave in, and took it to the repair shop.

There, I was met by a very nice old man, who assured me that the problem will be solved by the next day, at which point I could come and pick it up. I went home, feeling happy that everything was going to be over soon, and that I could once again use my laptop.

Sure thing, the next day I took it home, but I soon noticed strange things starting to happen. First, there was a weird sound coming from it, which, despite the fact that it was pretty quiet, could still be heard by my over-attentive ears. Then, as I opened Word to start working, I noticed that it would take a while for the words I was typing to show up on screen. This caused some concern, but I eventually just brushed it off, thinking that maybe it’s like organ transplant in humans- it just takes a while for the rest of the body to get accustomed to the brand new part.

A few days later, my theory crushed and burned, as I spent 2 hours trying to turn on my laptop, and start working. It would either just not turn on, or, when it would, it would refuse to open any programs.

So I took it right back to the same repair shop, where the guys looked at it and said that the hard drive had some issues, and so they gave me a new one at no extra cost, of course. Now, there is still that funny sound, but at least my laptop is working, and I’ll take that, thank you very much. Also, I have an impressive collection of 2 hard drives that don’t work. Pretty cool, huh?

/Larisa

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Old Photos

Via geograph.org.uk

Today, I decided to look thorough some of the old photos that had been gathering on my USB.

It’s a strange feeling, really, to see a picture, and remember the exact moment you took it, everything that happened before it, and after it. It’s like a little story that unfolds before your mind’s eye. But it’s so much more than that, because having lived through it makes the story a thousand times more amazing. Not in the sense that it’s necessarily better. But it has more emotional value, and it’s in that emotional value that makes it somehow exceptional.

And it’s not even huge, important moments necessarily. Maybe it’s something as simple as a beautiful flower you saw. Or maybe it’s a picture of a gorgeous scenery, that was taken at a moment when you felt really peaceful. It doesn’t really matter, because you’re taken back there, and you relive those moments.

Or maybe…maybe you don’t remember what had happened when you took that picture. Perhaps you’re just looking at it, smiling because you have no clue what was so special about that moment that you thought it needed to be immortalized.

Because photos, and the story they carry with them can be so interesting, I decided to open up a new section on this blog, called PS, which here stands for Photo and Story. Hope you’ll enjoy it 🙂 .

/Larisa